Exemption..FMT..Panic..Stress..Depress..

33 hours n 4 minutes to go before my Exemption Test..i desperately need to pass my exemption..sigh..how..i haf no idea..i only noe i need to pass..i mus pass..

60 hours n 34 minutes to go before my PP3 Video Exam..sigh..i hope i rmr my stuff well..n maintain sufficient eye contact..not forgettin a v important factor..EMPATHY!!

94 hours n 4 minutes to go before my FMT 1 Degree Exam..i dunno how i am goin to survive..judgin from the fact tat i haf not touched my FMT books yet..sigh..i need more time..but tat's impossible..no point regrettin now..haf to look forward..i mus pass..

156 hours n 4 minutes to go before my FMT 2 Degree Exam..likewise, i haven touch the book..sigh..i realli need to pass this time..

realli wanna continue study..yet i cant skip my sleep..i'm tired..yet i wanna study..sigh..stress to the max..my headache is back..

time is slipping by..faster n faster....

ALL THE BEST PPL FOR PP3, FMT 1 N 2..

too wuliao i guess..sigh..goin to sleep soon..nite ppl..

Great Expectations..

i din noe my parents had such high hopes on me..perhaps i shud haf realised it earlier..jus tat i dun wan to..it's so damn obvious..but yesterday's conversation really made me realised how huge the expectations my parents had..yet, i haf crushed their hopes again..sigh..cant go on like this..i haf to really really buck up..hope i can get exempted for PP3..all the best to everyone too..

EXPLOSION!!

i almost died of air pollution jus now..the explosion happened so abruptly, leaving me lil time to take cover..n the tot of me still havin my dinner at the time of the explosion jus disgusts me further more..all i can say now is tat i'm thankful tat i'm still alive and tat my room is no where near the site of explosion..n thank God it din trigger the fire alarm..wat will the firemen think??i wonder..

They Say...

they say it's better to haf an extra fren than an enemy..so..when do u decide that the frenship shud b over?to me, i think it shud haf been over ages ago..i've been too kind..anyway, i'm glad..very very glad..tat it's finally over..hehehe..yes..i lost a fren today..n i'm not upset bout it..nor happy..jus glad..it's been way too long..hmm..i wont exactly call X a fren..since God noes when X ad start to cease to b a fren..more like parasite i guess..many of u may not agree...but as far as i am concern, the side of X that i saw is definitely not pretty..probably, i was too blind to see X's beautiful part..or mayb as time goes by, i forgot bout the beauty..wat is left now is all the unpleasant parts..i shud haf end this frenship earlier..shudnt haf let it to get so ugly b4 ending it..at any rate, i'm still glad..tat it's finally over..n now, i shud start prepare myself..to protect myself..from future parasites..the worst parasites of all..

they say i'm a much better person viewed from a distance..so mayb u shud keep a distance too..dun get too close..u might get hurt..dun say i din warn ya...

I AM FREE!! sort of..hehe..still haf exams to go..

Wat Happen?

sigh..melanie told me tag board now no problem ad..but i still haf problem wif it..still can access to blogs using it..but acc to elyne, keli n mel, they can..is there sth wrong wif my laptop?o my browser?o wat??whenever i try to open any site related to tag board my browser will hang..sigh..damn irritatin..someone, help!!

Holiday Mood..

hehehe..feel like as if i'm on holiday..dread to think bout the class test on monday..anyway, did this the whole noon..jus finish..think it looks nice..

Alone..

sigh..i think i really shud change..n stop being so neno..stop doing things tat ppl din ask me to..so i can stop hurtin myself..today was really a very bad day for me..never felt so idiot in my life..giving out so much..yet the other party will never noe..even if she noes, she might not appreciate it..

think i shud start being selfish n stop doing silly things for others..stop thinkin bout others..wat's the point anyway..i'm gettin hurt anyway..i shud haf jus care bout myself n tat's it..cos ppl nv appreciate a good deed..initially they might..soon, they take it for granted..

strange how this may sound..i am always surrounded by ppl..yet, i'm always alone..mayb i'm jus to hard to get along..watever..i'll jus haf to get myself used to this..n stop wastin my time n feelings on other ppl..

wonder if tmr will b better..

Wat The Hell!!

to anyone who's readin this..i tot it's ad a common sense that u shudnt wake/disturb anyone who's sleeping..unless it's very very urgent..n if u happen to wake someone else, pls b apologetic bout it..dun gif me the neno look when i ask u if u noe i'm sleeping..say u r sorry o sth like tat..at least i wont get tat angry wif ya..n quickly finish wat u wan from me so i can get back to sleep..do NOT obstruct me from my sleep..for those of u who dunno, i value my sleep more than my life..and unfortunately, i do not value mos frenship more than my sleep..so i dun care who u are..best to leave me alone while i'm sleepin..unless i told u to wake me up at a specific time..n in this case if i got angry, jus slap me..

note: even my family leave me alone when i'm sleepin unless necessary..if u think u haf a good reason to wake me up, pls clarify..dun jus wake me up w/o any reason..sleepy ppl r most blur..so unless u state it, i dunno wat the hell u wan from me..

DO NOT DISTURB ME WHILE I'M SLEEPIN..

Another Boring Day...

was reading other ppl's blog..saw sth interesting in elyne's blog..was sth tat i wanted to write about for long time but can nv express it in words..

today damn a lot of ambulance..more than ten passed by my place ad..wat's wrong??i hope nothin serious is going on..gtg for now..got another 100pages to cover..sigh..oh, if u happen to b visitin elyne's blog, do read bout our neno housemate as well..think it was well written..i hate Henry..his eternal smile infuriates me..sigh..but i still haf to put up wif him..his smile is so damn fake..n kinda like gloatin at us..sigh...

damn pissed of at myself today..damn clumsy..n brainless..spill the whole packet of mee on the floor..wonder if it's still edible..i picked the top ones n kept it..most, was thrown away..wasting..sigh..wat to do..i'm bcomin more n more brainless n useles..

Caring?

was too bored..so went tickle.com n did the quiz..n got the below results..

Your caring nature is earning you the most karma!

You seem to be one of those people who has an uncanny ability to anticipate and meet the needs of others around you. This nurturing quality has helped you earn your karma up to this point. Your thoughtfulness strengthens your current relationships, and suggests that such kindnesses will be repaid to you some time in the future. Through your concerted efforts to express how much you care, you generate good karma for yourself and the universe.

caring?hehe..i'm not so sure bout tat..they make me sound like a saint..which i'm obviously not.."Your thoughtfulness strengthens your current relationships, and suggests that such kindnesses will be repaid to you some time in the future." perhaps i'm being a bit pessimistic here..but from most of my experiences, kindness n caring doesnt pay much these days..mayb i'm jus tired of being myself..tired of helpin ppl..used to think tat if ppl needs help n i can help then i'll help..now, i'll b thinkin if i can do this by myself why cant u?selfish huh?guess as i grow older the more selfish i bcome..n i always tot the older one gets the more selfless one will be..strange how things turn out to be..sigh..used to love pink..but somehow now i hate tat colour..not those sweet light pink..but those neno pink(cant find the colour..not fluorescence pink..)..guessed it's normal gua..even if it's other colours if i haf to see it everyday n stuff, sooner o later i'll be sick of it..like how i'm feelin it nw..let's jus hope i'll change for the better..

lol..was supposed to post bout other stuffs first..but jus tat sudd feel like bloggin bout this first..

I'm So PROUD of Myself!!

hehe..i'm very very proud n pleased wif myself..for once..hehe..as u can see i've changed the blog skin..not bcos i dun like the old one..i like the old one..jus tat wanna change a bit..n somehow, this skin kinda suits my mood now..dunno how long this skin will last cos i intend to put the old skin back..depends on how the reactions are to this new skin..even now i've comments tat they cant find the buttons to click in..hmm..intend to put back the old skin..bcos it's done by someone dear to me..still is..tat's y i retain the song..even though i think it doesnt really suit this skin..does it?dunno..need comments on this..

i spent like 3 to 4 hours to make this thing work..damn neno i noe..sigh..wat to do..damn idiot in this..got to go now..going to george square..may blog later..depends on mood..

Hercules in Glasgow...

they say a picture is worth a thousand words..so i guess i shudnt say more..u'll understand when u see the pictures ..

before

after

Less Less Less..

i've decided..from today onwards, i'll cook lesser rice..lesser dishes..lesser portions..i've been worrying too much..too worried tat i starve my housemates..today only i realised i always cook too much..till they cant finish..haf to change this habit of mine fast..probably should cook faster too..since most of them are partially full when i'm done..due to the food they store in their rooms..wonder wat happened to the excess soup..perhaps not going to boil any soup in future..

FMT Class Tests..

din wanna post anythin one..basically jus plain lazy n nothing to tok bout..but since i ad log in to change a few things on my blog n i cant sleep, i guess i'll jus update my life no matter how meaningless it seems..

hehe..if someone sees this he/she might neno me for it..cos life's nv meaningless..but meaningless to me as in there's nothin much to write about..things are certainly gettin mundane here..when it wasnt, i was jus too lazy to blog..

for those back at home, i've got public holidays on 14th n 17th..why?i have no idea..hehe..anyone who noes let me noe k?it may seem to b a great opportunity to go travel ard glasgow..too bad..everythin happens for a reason..i've to stay at home n eat my two thick FMT books..even after eatin them i still dun understand the stuffs..useles..my FMT class tests are on 18th n 20th respectively..all together i've got ard 500 pages to eat..the good news is..it's multiple choice questions..for someone lack of ambitions like me, a pass will b good enuff..n if i'm lucky enuff, i probably will get 60 over for both class tests..but experience taught me not to expect too high..then u wont get hurt tat much..bsides if u score higher than expected u'll b over the moon..a perfect way to deceive urself..i've totally mastered it..very easy to achieve too..jus sleep ur troubles away..

it doesnt matter if u dun understand this entry..i myself haf difficulty in understandin it..reason y is cos i'm writin this w/o a clear mind..woke up two hour ago..but still feel tat part of me is sleepin..dun ask me bout this either cos i'll forget 90% of this after my sleep..usually does..wonder how am i going to pass my tests n how i've managed to pass them..since i normally forget 90% of the stuff..

ok..enuff of neno-ing..wanna go back to sleep now..shud haf gone back to sleep one hour ago..tmr got to start study..sigh..tak ada mood langsung..part of me hope tat the class test will b postphone..part of me dun..in the end i decided tat i'll jus let nature takes its course..while i watch the world from my dreamland..

GOOD LUCK PPL..FOR FMT CLASS TEST..

PS:i jus change my chatter box to tag board..spent like more than an hour to choose the colour to match my blog..dunno whether it suits o not..let me noe wat u think ok?thanks..nite ppl...

I'm Not ME

it may be removed..but let this b a reminder..i'm no longer the Ai Lian tat P1/04 knew..

I've Been Dreamin for Too Long....

i've been dreamin for too long..until my eyes are clouded..until i cant tell wat is reality n wat is fantasy..sigh..

n only now i've realised how unfair this world is..how unfair ppl tend to judge u..how unfair each person is treated..today, i feel tat i've been judged n treated unfairly..today, is also the day where other ppl at other parts of the world who are judged n treated more unfairly than me..n yet, i haf always tot that this world is fair..that humans are blessed wif eyes..eyes tat were given for us to see..to see the diff bet right n wrong..yet, some of us are too blinded..for once i'm loss..am i doing the right thing??i guess i've been sleeping too much..way too much..i can feel the "old" me creeping back..is this a good thing?i dunno...

wat i do noe is tat i've tried my entire life to control the "old" me..to control it so that i might bcome a better person..yet, i think i'm fightin a losing battle..n i dun care anymore..i'm tired..seriously tired..tired of thinkin..tired of being judged unfairly every time..tired of everythin..

total equality may come one day..it may not..i used to think tat it's possible to haf equal treatment, equal judgement..as long as we humans try..now, i think i've been sleeping n dreamin for too long..

i feel like shoutin..but i cant..i feel like cryin..but i cant..mayb i should jus go back to sleep..n nv wakes up..to those who had judge me before..dun b too eager to judge ppl next time..u r not God..hence, dun judge ppl..

i'm sick of everythin...i've never felt like saying fuck u so much in my life.........bcos today i lost my freedom..

Bed Bugs!!

sigh..i really think village office should jus move us to thomas campbell court..the bed bugs in james blyth court is spreadin..and damn fast too..now i dun dare to open my windows cos acc to some ppl the bed bugs flew into their room..although i cant imagine how..sigh..i still worried they can creep in thru holes in the unit..

I wanna move!!

i dun think it's possible though..cos i heard those who are ad affected are moved to j flat temporarily..sigh...

btw, i cut my hair..hehehe..not really used to it..but i think it looks damn nice..my hairstylist is tze yan..thanks for the hair cut, tze yan!!

Masterpiece

i finally got the molecular formula right..lol..

For My Sis

at the botanical garden..

me n elyne

blur

dunno the name of the flowers..but nice..

can u spot the bee?

his name is jeff

Japanese?

my batch mates are in bbc news..this pic was taken on 10th june on the west end festival in glasgow..one of the staff in strathclyde saw it..n told keli who in turn told my housemates..u can get the pic at bbc news

tat's all for now..too many stuff happen over the weekend..lazy to blog..oh ya..i think my photography skills improve a lot..hehehe..took many pics on the weekends..but i love the one below the most..cos it's a lady bird!!

My First Cookin in Glasgow

pasta in mayonise, light soya sauce, chicken ham, egg n mushroom..too much pasta added..so cant really see the other ingredients..

vege for the day..no idea wat it is called in english..

tat's all for dinner..looks miserable..

my first cookin in glasgow..was on 13th june..today (16th june) supposed to cook as well..but in the end din..so i guess on mon i got to cook..

think i got to sleep now ad..tmr got to get up early n go for city tour..

My Add n More

oh ya..forgot to include my address..n some pics..

Block H Flat 9-1,
James Blyth Court,
57, Rottenrow East,
Glasgow G4 0NG.

i dun think i'm giving my phone number..cos it's a land line n i'll be in uni most of the times..wat to do..9-5 classes..mon-fri..n i think it's much much cheaper if i call u..hehehe..which is kinda rare lar..will let u noe if i got a mobile..not so soon though..

my bed..love it..looks so much like candy..lol

the view outside my window..daytime..

the view outside my window..at nite..

my lovely student id..lol..love it lots..much much nicer than imu's..

huey and her spagetti..our first meal here..

agnes wif hers..

mine..

finished in a meal..sorry elyne!!

my left ear..

my right ear..

guess wat they are doin..

at the subway..oso known as the "tube"..i think..on my way to hillhead for the carnival..

ok..got to stop here..too many pics to upload..not tat the connection here sux..in fact it's much much faster than at home..i'm jus tired..wanna sleep ad..nite ppl..oh ya..the time diff here in summer is 7 hours..from m'sia..

btw..my chatter box has prob..can anyone not in strathclyde see the chatterbox??anyone noe how to get a new one??cos my last one is not done by me..lol..thanks a lot!!

Glasgow

i'm way behind in writing blog if i were to compare to other ppl..hehehe..anyway, i reached glasgow safe n sound..n i'm love this place so much i really really dun wanna go back..mayb it's for summer only..who noes by the time winter comes i'm dying to go back..

i think on the whole my mind sort of receive this new environment wif open arms..my body however, is another story..had rashes yest..started from my feet..then it moves up..until it covers my whole body..took a pic of it..not very clear though..had to go to jasmine's place to borrow shorts..cos i din haf any..i really tot glasgow is like north pole..cold cold cold..to my surprise it was hot hot hot..thank God now it's getting colder..hehehe..which is bad news..cos i'm getting sleepier..

today, i had this really pain stomach ache (hmm..this sentence sounds so strange..)..was fine in the mornin but during the noon, the pain started..till it was so bad that i can hardly stand..n for those who noes how glasgow is like (ur only transport is walk..walk..n more walk..) might noe how i felt..so i left the lab session in noon early..i think hardly anyone except those who noe notice my disappearance..cos everyone is busy wif their stuff..anyway, now i'm feeling much better..although still a bit pain..

i'm the only one in the class i blieve who had been to the townhead health centre (it's a hospital i think) thrice within a week..n i certainly hope i wont b going there any more..after my appointment on 27th tat is..

well, my impressions bout glasgow (not so good ones) are basically tired tired tired..walk walk walk..hills hills hills..busy busy busy..hot hot hot (although now it's not quite true)..n finally, expensive expensive expensive..hmm..i find tat even though some stuffs are really expensive, there are some which are really cheap..erm, i think it's only applicable to gals..cos so far all those tat i find cheap are those for gals..hehehe..

good impressions will be the weather (i'm kinda contradicting myself..i noe)..the ppl (all tat i've met so far are polite n frenly..although some were quite unfrenly but still tolerable..i've heard some extreme cases though..like wen wei's hat was snatch while walking..also not forgettin jasper's room was bombarded wif stones by the local..the reason? i've no idea at all..they are prob all drunk o half way..cos i've seen them at their fav spot..rite outside my window..)..so except for the few cases, i felt that generally the ppl here are much much better than in malaysia..n ard here, it's fairly safe..cos back in malaysia i always haf to worry bout snatch thief n stuff..but i guess ard here ppl dun snatch ur stuff..they "pick" ur stuff..hence the word pick pockets..

i'm still trying to get use to the scottish slang which varies among the ppl here..some has a much diff to understand slang some are generally ok..wasnt really used to their coins as well..except one pound which is fairly easy to recognise..but i guess i'm getting used to it..

oh ya..i wonder was it the cold o the walkings..cos i tend to eat more here..a lot more..sigh..hope i wont get fat..i dun think i will wif all the walkin..lol..

went to the west side of glasgow on sunday for a carnival..sat the "tube"..which cost me 2 pounds..sigh..kinda "xin tong"..anyway, i really regret not explorin the place more during the carnival..esp after seeing acrix's photo n heard bout other ppl's experiences..sigh..no point regrettin now i guess..also regret not transferin my photos n videos to my laptop bfore the carnival..cos i only manage to take two photos of the carnival n my memory card was full..to think i even brought along an extra batt jus in case..sigh..so i'm going to get the pics from acrix soon..i hope..

glasgow is nv boring..there's always activities here..forget bout world cup..yest, sth interesting n funny happen..always makes me laugh when i think back..for more details, pls visit here..but i'm sure most P1/04 blogs will haf sth on it..for accurate details of the whole incident, pls ask the main character himself..cos i'm not so sure bout the details..only noe wat happen roughly..kinda "kesian" him..cos he had to pay 100 pounds for that little "prank" he played..

oh ya..i'm currently broke cos i paid like 90 pounds for five books..three of which are photostated copies..n i had not bank in my bank draft yet..sigh..so basically i'm "eating air" nowadays..which explains y i had a tummy upset today..

had pp3 lab officially today..enjoyed it to the max..how fun if there wasnt any stress attached..noe-ing tat no marks is gonna go into ur assessment..too bad that's not the case..jus hope i pass my pp3..

my hands still reeks of garlic..even after 24 hours..sigh..next time i cook i'm not going to use garlic..think i got to stop now..haf to sleep o else tmr i'm going to doze off again..like tues..slept in front of dr gray..hope i din left out anythin cos a lot had happened within these few days..

Sick..Really Sick..

ok..so tat was not the last entry bfore i leave for glasgow..sigh..dunno y sudd got so many things to write..but this one will b damn short..

sigh..first, it's sore throat..then flu..then cough..now, diarrheoa...sigh..hope will b ok by tues..

I WANNA GET WELL SOON..

When Too Much Love Means Trouble..

sigh..i tot the last entry for my blog bfore i go over to glasgow will b on the convo on 27th may..but since everyone has ad blog bout it since last week n since i dun haf many pics of myself..i think i'll jus skip the convo thingy..

i just came back from kl on 1st june..and ad i was n still am surrounded wif love..too much perhaps..everyone seems to wan me for themselves..lol..it does sounds as if i'm damn attractive..wat to do..now only left around two days bfore i leave for glasgow for a year..wif someone as talkative as me sure got ppl miss one lar..hehehe..

to show how popular i am at home, i decided to show a few examples..sigh..i worry by tues i ad grown fat like a pig..

scene 1:

main concern: din get the chance to eat all the food before leaving..

solution: cook as much food for me as possible

problem: problem arises when my parents n grandparents are both anxious bout me..how, u may ask..i tell u how..as usual i went to granny's place for dinner..noe-ing i got to leave soon, my granny cooked a lot for me..tat's pretty acceptable..problem occurs when i dun eat much during dinner..reason : i was sick..n still am..wif sore throat, cough n cold..so, no heaty food n spicy food for me..next, when i reach home, my mum went to cook fish for me..apparently, my dad bought some really huge fish..n asked my mum to cook for me..again the problem arises when i dun eat much..reason: i jus had dinner at granny's place..n the fish was fried..in assam flavour..wif my granny's damn hot chilli..since i was pretty full n i was having sore throat, i din eat much..so dad was doing wat he is best at times like this..grumbling..so i explain to him tat i was having sore throat..n i cant eat much cos it's fried n spicy..can never tell him i was kinda full..o else the grumbling will never stop..instead of stop grumbling he told me tat it's ok to eat the fried fish..tat it wont affect my sore throat etc..so in the end i ended up damn full..

scene 2:

main concern: din get the chance to eat all the food before leaving again..

solution: cook as much food for me as possible again..

problem: this time, granny cooked my favourite curry..even though she knew i got sore throat etc..well, being the neno me, how can i missed my favourite curry??so i ate even though i had sore throat..din eat rice though..cos dad told me not too..tonite there's more fish again..this time it's fish head..problem arise when mum discover i was having curry..dad was kinda angry (his feelings started from worry..worry tat i wont get well soon..which ended up to be anger)..angry tat my granny still cooked me curry even when she knew i was sick..but to me cant blame entirely on her..well, anyway, wat i dun get it here is tat: how come i was allowed to eat the fried fish yest n not the curry today??jus bcos it's my dad's wish then it's ok to eat?sigh..sometimes i think love is selfish..only allows wat the ppl u love to do ur way..oh ya..n so my dad's grumbling starts again..

scene 3:

main concern: to stuff all my things into the luggage

solution: help me pack

problem: well, i'm glad that my dad offer to pack for me..which is a rare thing..so i damn appreciate his help..until..trouble comes..well, this time, my parents are quarelling..over how to pack my bag..mum insists tat all shampoo, cleanser, toothpaste etc must b in plastic bags in case they spill..dad insists not to put in plastic bags as it takes up space(acc to him lar..to me i personally feel tat it's much more secure to b in the plastic bags..but noe-ing my dad, u never win him one..esp when u're suffering from sore throat)..so therefore, war happened n pass..i survived wif no injuries..how?well, i escape to upstairs n chat wif bro bout the war below..when i came back downstairs, voila! my bag is packed..n fyi, my dad won the battle (not surprising at all)..so my stuff are pack w/o the plastic bags..gonna repack my stuff tmr when he went to work..scared it really will spill..

well, i'm damn happy tat my family loves me so much..mind u, i'm not complainin..i'm damn grateful, althou some of u may misinterpret my intentions..i'm bloggin bout it cos i'm pretty amused at how silly one can b..esp when they are blinded by love..lol..

I LOVE MY FAMILY...A LOT..

hope no one notices me crying on tues..hehe..gonna bring lots of tissues..oh ya..did i mention my bro was damn sweet to me these days?n missed my sis A LOT..she was gone for a few hours n i missed her ad..dun get me wrong..i missed her cos she was my "free slave" at home..lol..

to all P1/04,

BON VOYAGE..N SEE U SOON..

oh ya..mum made me a lot of lovely stuff..cant wait to use them soon..lol..wont blog till i settled down in glasgow..take care ppl..

Are You Ready??

hmmm..are you ready to leave your home to a place so far away and so cold to further ut studies?i'm not prepared to leave yet..but my parents esp my mum are making lots of preparation to get me out of the house..lol..

anyway, while everyone is busy deciding whether to buy their winter clothing here o in scotland, most of my problem is solved..let's see..i ad got a sweater, a scarf, a pair of gloves..made by my mum..lol..as for winter clothings n stuff, i really shudnt worry much..cos i ad got two..mum bought me one when she went to melb last year..dad bought another when he went japan last year..sigh..seems like my parents are damn eager to get me out of the house..hehehe..anyway, i dunno y, but i'm damn happy n excited today..

probably is cos of my sis..she's going japan..lucky her..sigh..wished i could join her..if not for sem 6..sad sad..tmr's wesak day..very important day for me..hehehe

Happy Wesak Day!!

Lazy n Bored

i guess i'm jus not used to it..not used to the new-found freedom..fact is i'm bored to death..yet i'm still as lazy as ever..lazy to do anything..my clinical attachment notes are still lying somewhere in my room..i dun even noe where it is now..i haven even think of wat to bring to Strathclyde..haven even done my shopping..man..i cant go on like this..sigh..

was browsin thru google..(nowadays, google is my best fren..helpin me fight against boredom..)anyway, i found out another person's blog..nothin suprisin since nowadays most ppl blog..the thing is this person's name is same as mine..so ya..i found ai lian's blog..she's from s'pore n is four years younger than me..wonder how many more ppl is called ai lian..

btw, was watchin thomas cup semis yest..sigh..none of my frens from jb watch it..acc to them it's an old man's type of game..they prefer football..hmmm..i wonder if it's really a sports that only 'ah pek' watches..i definitely hope not..hopefully i'm not the only non-'ah pek' who's crazy in thomas cup..

sigh..malaysia lost..indonesia lost..left china..gonna watch the finals tmr..thank God there's astro..

tv is useless without astro..

Taking a Break

ppl..pls dun bother to email me anymore cos i'm going back kl tmr..wont b checkin my emails..besides tat on thurs (27/4/06) dun even bother to sms o call me..my phone will be off..i need a break..thanks..so see ya all on fri :)

Get Off My Back

attention to all P1/04 ppl who happenned to read this..pls read carefully the emails i send to u..dun come n kept asking the things again n again..if i noe about sth i'll sure email it to u..i'm not tat selfish to tat extent i will keep anything from u..if i dun email to u then i do not noe..i noe my emails can sometimes b v confusin as the facts kept changing everyday..every minute..like the case of the offer letter..but it's not my fault i myself do not noe tat much..if u think tat i did such a bad job then pls contact hira, imu etc urself..i quit..

i've been so bz answering all ur questions that my own application haf not been done at all..i haven got anything photostated n stuff..so pls..gif me a break..o do this urself..u are old enuff..n i ad gaf u all the necessary info..

I Need To Pass

I NEED TO PASS

I Pass

I PASS

SADNESS

How do you define sadness? How do you express it? Some do by crying out loud..Some by crying silently..Is sadness something that is felt by the heart?Is it express with or without tears? Or both? If sadness is something that is felt by the heart, how does it feel to be sad? To what extent can one be sad? If extreme sadness can cause loss of appetite and insomnia in some, why not in the others as well? If the same thing happens to you as it had happened to me, how will you feel? What will be your reaction? Will you breakdown like some, or will you watch as calmly as possible, not shedding a single tear, yet your heart felt as if it will stop that instant? Or will you be like me? Standing there, watching him, I thought of nothing, I felt nothing and I did nothing..No tears ran down my cheeks..It's as if I am totally detatched of the situation..It's as if I'm not there..Why is it that there's not a single trace of that wretched pain that I used to felt before? Is it because that I am not sad at all? is he that unimportant to me? Or perhaps I'm too sad for words that my heart went numb and my mind went blank? I don't know..Is there something wrong with me? Am I a cold and emotionless creature? It had happened before, six years ago..Six years ago I felt nothing as well..Will I feel the same as well in the future? Or will I be different then? Can anyone tell me what exactly is sadness? How do you know that you are sad? Am I feeling sad now?

~ Does it mean that if you cry you're weaker than the rest? Or is there more to it? Tears - a symbol of weakness or sadness? ~

Jus This Once..

jus this once i'm going to break my rules..my rules of not blogging till finals are over..actually not going to blog much now..

this entry is dedicated to my frens..all those still in vista..who have been helping me for so long..without u there's really no me..

first..need to thank my housemates n roommate..who has been busily helping me wif stuff..without u i dunno how i can manage to pass the notes to the class..i dunno how i'll noe which group i'm in..n i wont b able to change to the first week..without them my life now will be damn messy..

next..i need to thank my two neno frens..agnes n huey..hehehe..without them i wont haf survived till so long..would haf died of boredom long time ago..plus the endless usage of huey's internet access whenever i needed it.. not forgetting agnes' never ending entertainment..the only person in IMU who can talk till i drop..

last but not least..keli n lay..hehe..thanks to them i can haf free one nite stand whenever i wan :p

plus at keli there oso got internet access..hehehe..n thanks keli for getting my notes n explainin stuff i nv understood so patiently..

to all my frens..thanks for neno-ing wif me n tolerating me so far..not an easy job :)

lastly,

HAPPY 38 'FU NU JIE'

Pink Panther

PINK PANTHER

MUST WATCH...

Google Talk

for those who haf gmail account, u can now chat using google talk..it's also accessible in IMU..hehehe..still trying to explore the thing..for more info pls visit bear's blog..gtg now..haven had lunch..sigh..hungry~

Finally....

sigh..guess it's been a long long time since i blog..i even forgotten my pwd..hmmm..i'm finally back at home..so i finally have internet access..my uni does provides internet access..but it's for patient ppl only..for those short temper ppl like me who dun mind trashing the computers if they dun do wat u want, really haf to restrain from using those in the uni..

too many things happen in between ad..hmm, n i'm too lazy n tired to write out all..so will jus point out few main points..

finally watched geisha..watched it las year wid lynn, bear n yan..finally finish dd3 report..which has been bugging me for days..rob me of my precious sleep..finally got my hair dyed..even at the risk of facing the music..prob ws due to the dd3 stress..finally finish reading bear's time traveller's wife..and also quite a number of books..enjoyed them all..how i wished i could jus relax n read every single day till i finish every single book there is to read..finally bear had moved in..and for her i sacrificed my sleep..sigh..uncle chow mus b missing me now..

finally went to the cinemas..first time this year..finally went to watch oliver twist n pride n prejudice..nice movies..hehehe..the sound system in midvalley din really do oliver twist any justice..perhaps if they got better systems i would enjoy the movie more..nevertheless, the movie was great..pride n prejudice really makes me wanna read the original book..prob becos there's kinda plenty of loopholes in bet..as if there's no flow in them..hehehe..perhaps it's jus me..

finally went to watch fearless..wif whole family..very strange thing to do..i mus say jet li is damn great..to b able to attract ppl like my parents to once again step their foot in the cinemas..hmm..overall the movie was great..many hidden values..hehehe..the action part..hmmm..wasnt really tat great..i love the moves..no doubt bout tat but i'm not sure it's bcos of the editing o wat the fights did not go as smoothly as it shud be..perhaps it's jus me again..

finally realise n ready to admit that my english is going down hill..thanks to prof yeoh..hehehe..sigh..so i shall not torture u anymore by forcing u to read this half-past six english..

finally..this entry will end here.........................

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR TO ALL!!

The Pics

bday gal n pressie

bday gal

all of us

this is only part of the photo we took yest..lazy to post lar..hehehe..oh ya..who think tat ms lai elyne should make full use of her pressie (that tiny black bag) pls tag either me o her..hehehe..

Busy Week

well..this week was pretty busy for me..

hmm..let's start from last fri which is the 6/1/06..many things happened tat day..my granduncle was hospitalised on monday (2/1/06)..and being the antisocial person i've become, i jus found out bout it on fri..sigh..he jus had a surgery so was pretty weak..was there for less than half an hour bfore he chased us home..hehehe..

on saturday (7/1/06), more shocking news..sigh i forgot pretty much wat i did on tat day..lazing ard as usual i guess..

then on sunday (8/1/06), waited whole day for sophia to reach..oh ya..got an sms from qi at ard 3 am..was pretty blur tat time..tot was sophia who sms-ed me..anyway, i fell asleep while waiting for sophia to contact me..hmmm..then got her back safe n sound to my place n we chat then after she showered we went times square to meet qi..more shocking news were exchanged..sigh..i really wonder if i can take it anymore..three equally shocking news on three days straight..then after dinner we went back..plan to go taiping on mon after class..we tok till God noes wat time bfore i finally decided to sleep..

on monday (9/1/06), i prayed like hell for classes to end super early so i can catch the bus..sigh..well, the lectures did end early but things are not as planned..after another shocking news and some 'fight', i begin my journey to taiping..my mood tat day was super low..sigh..partly was because of my super low pp2 marks..i'm hopeless i guess..well, anyway after dinner my spirits began to pick up..hehehe..had the best fried oyster i had ever tasted..missing it deeply..then we went back to qi's place n chat till kinda late..discovered tat the Australian Pharmacy course is much much more intense than us..i wonder why??this kinda makes me more sad..

anyway, slept till ard 10 am the next day..after my breakfast, qi's mum fetch me to the bus station n off i go..sleep throughout the whole journey..was damn jam in kl so i got off the bus at ard hang tuah lrt station there..reach vista at ard 4.30pm..at six went to nite market wif huey, nes n bear..then played mahjong till ard 12am..slept at ard 2am..sick n tired..happy though..cos my granduncle was discharged (a day earlier than expected)..

on wed (11/1/06), i was so damn sick tat even after wearing one long sleeve shirt n two jacket, i can still feel the cold piercing to my bones..plan to skip class to see doc but thank God dr soh finishes his class early as usual..then in the end i still din see doc..cos stephanie gaf me medicine ad..man, she's really good..hehehe..can be a doc ad..thanks to her i'm ok now..at ard 12pm, i left wif sophia to pyramid to meet tai ka jie..hmm..act plan to go sg wang too..but i guess the medicine cause drowsiness..cos an hour later i felt damn sleepy..went home after lunch straight..n then i literally sink into my bed like a dead corpse..sleep was peaceful except the call from bear..then ard evening, sophia came n took her stuff..

on thurs (12/1/06), i was still tired after all those tat happened..but since during the weekends, many of us went back so we cant celeb for our ms bear's 21st bday..in the end we decided to celeb it today..ms bear, u better b grateful for this..i sacrificed my beauty sleep to make tat card for u..n mind u, the words are mine..sigh..was kinda sad when u tot that i copied it out from somewhere..but i guess tat proves how good my english is..hehehehe..anyway, i hope u like ur gift..dun think is much of a surprise cos we literally plan everythin in front of u

fri..which is today..sigh..friday the 13th..black friday..well, woke up damn early acc to my standards for the PP briefing..sigh..in my state of semi awake, i was wondering over sth..whether it's sth tat happened o it's jus my dream..hmm..soon figured out it was a dream (thank God)..cos i dreamt of my granduncle hospitalised again..sth got to do wif the wound reopening o wat..not sure the details..but the situation is kinda serious..was informed by my mum thru phone..how i noe it's a dream?cos i always off my hp when i sleep..so tat i can haf continous sleep throughout the nite..guess tat's all for now..my whole body is craving for my bed..

Infectious Disease

Description : Highly contagious..Little is known bout the disease..Once u haf it, it'll stick with u for life..

Symptoms : Cant get enuff sleep constantly..sleepy all the time..lethargic..

Treatment : None..except to sleep to relieve the symptoms..

Cause : Unknown

Pathology : Unknown

Name of Disease : Penyakit Lee Ai Lian

hehehe..lately my poor room mate got 'sick'..seems tat my disease had spread to her..hope she recovers soon..or else i'll mos prob b late for class each day..sigh..

damn happy yest..bought my fav type of pants..bought three to be exact..all same pattern but diff colour..a bit siao..then bought a bikini..dunno for wat oso..but man, i look damn good in it..hehehe..plan to study one but kinda got lazy after the first day..but sophia's sake i guess i'll have to study hard..sigh..hope i can finish studying before she comes o else i'll b in deep trouble..

was kinda surprised when yu hua told me she read my blog to keep her update wid my life..hehehe..really pity her..cos my blog n frenster is so outdated..thanks to my other disease (laziness)..really damn lazy to update my blog lar..not to mention my frenster which is like dead ad..hmm..will try to update my blog more frequently..anyway, take care wor, yu hua..wonder if we'll b able to meet bfore i leave for scotland in june..

ok got to stop now..penyakit lee ai lian is striking now..now i jus wished for my bed..my dear comfy bed.........

My Best Fren

sigh..i've been living on this Earth for 20 yrs..yet only today i found out who my best fren is..she's the only person on Earth who always patiently listen to me day n nite..when i'm still weak n vulnerable, she's the one who's always been taking care of me..n she's the only one i can confidently say who is always anxious bout my well-being..she's oso the only one who noes wat i like n hate..n rite now, she's the one i trust most..not tat i dun trust the others..but if i were to put trust in a scale hers would be 100%..

decided to blog bout this since it's the first day of the year..so kinda make things a bit significant..ironically, when i jus discover this best fren, my another best fren left me..shud haf noe it coming..anyway, wat's past is past..hmmm..in case any of u is wonderin, i'm not writing this entry bcos i us lost a best fren..ad plan to write bout this this noon..

ok..back to my best fren..sigh..couldnt wait to see her when i come back jb the next time..dunno wat i'll do w/o her..oh ya..was quite amused when she asked me if i had a boyfren lately..hehehe..anyway, thank you very much, Granny..too bad u'll nv see this..sigh..perhaps one day if i got the courage i'll tell it to u personally..u'll probably think i'm silly..but i dun mind..love your curry damn much..hehehe...

THANKS..

Going Backwards..

perhaps it's the new year..perhaps i'm jus plain wuliao..perhaps both..anyway let's turn back time to 23/12/2005..my family reach at ard 1pm..i think..anyway, thanks to lynn..i was able to move all my stuff to the car..man..my sis really have grown..hehehe..then we left vista n checked into a hotel in PJ..then dad went for his meeting..i tot he purposedly took leave to come kl to find me..in the end it turn out tat he came to kl for a meeting..anyway i'm jus glad n grateful tat i dun need to drag my stuff to pudu n travel home by bus..

hmm..let's see..then mum, sis n i took taxi to pyramid..nothing much to shop..sigh..wanted to buy tat dress tat i loved so much..the dress tat i tried on the last time i came there..then sudd i realised tat lay had the same dress..exactly the same one..how i noe, u may ask..i saw her wore it on wed..sigh..even comment tat the dress was lovely..so in the end i din buy..

after we were totally bored of pyramid, we went midvalley..hehehe..bought a LOT of polo shirt..(sounds crazy)..n bought a book titled "still life"..sis was kinda disappointed cos she couldnt find any clothes to her liking..so ya..she sulked all the way..hehehe..later we went to aunty nat for dinner..hmmm..prefer the last time i went wif my uncle..hehehe..cos the fish we ordered las time was bigger..we went back to the hotel..dirty n tired..then played a few rounds of cards wid sis bfore sleeping at 9pm..came back to jb on 24/12/2005 after breakfast..

on 25/12/2005, my aunt n cousins came to jb!!yeah..hehehe..din do much on 25th cos by the time they reach it's ad at nite..the next day, we went shopping!!yeah!!hehehe..bought a dress similar to the one i loved in pyramid one..only to find out tat lay had the same dress..man, she really loves those dresses..hehehe..heck care lar..i prefer this dress cos the prints are in PINK!!hehe..think tat's all i bought..my sis like org gila..bought over RM 300..(sigh..if only i haf tat much of money..i can pay of half of the car damages..)oh ya..bought an elle t-shirt as well..hehe..n plenty of undies..my cousins bought a few lar..my sis is still the insane one..hehehe..

on 27/12/2005..my fren's elian's bday..i stayed at home attempting to do the dd3 project in vain..my cousins n aunts went to city square for more shopping..oh ya..woke up VERY early today cos my cousins wan me to teman them for breakfast..needless to say i return home after tat to continue my sleep..then woke up for lunch again..bro belanja..cos my aunt's bday coming soon..hehehe..love the lunch..too bad not in the mood to enjoy..then in the evening, went lavender n bought a cheese cake for my aunt..hehehe..glad to hear tat she loved our gift..hehehe..guess it's really true tat the greatest gift comes in small packages..hehehe..cos the one me n sis gaf to her was really small compare to the others..hmmm..after blowing the candles n stuff she left at ard 12 am..sigh, begin to miss my cousins n aunt ad..anyway i got addicted to computer games today..sigh..

was browsing thru my laptop's photo today (30/12/2005)..saw some of the pics i took in Melbourne..then i realised how much i missed Melbourne..sigh..hopefully i can visit there again..wonder when will tat be.....

ps: wont be blogging tat frequently next year..IMU's connection sux..i would rather sleep at home..so will only blog when i'm in jb..

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

An Expensive Christmas This Year

sigh..so many things happen ever since i las blog..there are good n bad things..first i injured my toe while opening a door..ended up seeing doc in the mid of the nite..thanks to penang sharon n ming jia..who willingly bcame my driver..n thanks for yan for caring for me..hehehe..hmmm..was saying tat yan's bf a bit 'duo zhai duo nan'..seems like the kettle calling the pot black (watever it is)..sigh..

Lady Luck definitely is not smiling at me at the moment..sigh..the worst xmas gift i gaf my poor neighbours today..i knock into their car..sigh..their back lights n my front lights were spoilt..damn embarassing as the whole street came out to find out wat had happened (naturally)..but i'm more ashamed bout how tat accident happened..sigh..wat a 'great' xmas eve tat i'll nv forget..so ms bear i'll b quite broke for a long time as i need to pay for the damages..i guess there will b no more trips for movies for me for the time being..sigh..n ms ling wei, i guess i cant go to tanjung after all..sigh..oh ya..in case if u r wondering, i was on my way to meet wif a fren for movies..after tat accident i was fetch to the movies..

hmm..the movie sux anyway..either tat o i was still in shock after tat accident..oh ya, my dear ai ren..my dad din scold me..hahaha..heard from my mum he warned my bro n sis not to mention bout it ever in front of me..so i guessed i can stop worrying bout my bro n sis making fun of me..sigh..i now only fear bout my grandparents n aunts since they haf yet to find out..tmr..tmr will reveal everything..sigh..i guess my grandpa will NEVER sit in my car..hehehe..dunno bout my granny though..i wont dare to fetch them anyway..sigh...........oh ya..jus tot of someone who will definitely NOT sit in my car after hearing this..my uncle..hehehe..

sigh..i guess tat shud b enuff bout the bad stuff..cos i dun really feel like toking bout it yet i cant pretend it nv happened (although i would love to do so v much..if only i can turn back time)..oh well..had a great time after pp2 class test..had steamboat tat nite wif yan, bear, lynn n her bf..then later went penthouse n borrow mah jong from then..n being a kaki judi i taught them how to play mah jong..we played till ard 3 am n lynn went to sleep..the rest of us (me, bear n yan) play 'tiga kaki' till ard 6am..then after cleaning the dishes, bear left..me n yan plan not to sleep..in the end i slept in her room..she was still studyin(damn rajin)..on thurs (22/12), the attendance was very bad for Dr. Soh's lecture..(fri was worst)..i was late for Dr. Ong's class..after having a tok wif Dr. Soh bout tat day's attendance..can see from his expression he was very disappointed..he expected full attendance on tat day esp it's after the class test..think he v kelian cos he's a very good lecturer..till now he haven told PP bout our poor attendance as he fully understand tat there are ppl who ponteng to study for coming exams..but i guess to him it's a bit unbearable to still haf poor attendance for thurs (n fri, i think)..sigh..so to all P1/04 who happen to read this, pls attend his lecture..

tat nite we had tang yuan..hehe..guess i can proudly say tat i did them with bear's n yan's help..but i guess i'm still not tat good in cooking compare to both of them..hehehe..bear damn 'ngim chim' bout her tang yuan...hehehehe..but i really think tat the ginger not strong enuff..keli n lay came first..then they both left..lay to i dunno where n keli to teman huey san to makan..then huey n agnes came..then me, yan, bear n agnes played mah jong (again..sigh..yan n bear addicted ad..)huey left to penthouse place..when she return at ard 10pm i think, i decide to end the game n return the set to penthouse..plan to go tok for a while but seems tat they were going out for dinner..sigh..so in the end went back wif keli (she was at penthouse too) cos keli wanna go take her pot n stuff..huey n agnes went back..

then as i was about to open the door for keli n bear for them to leave, the wooden door somehow (i oso dunno how it happened) 'cut' my toe..if u look at it now it's probably nothing..but tat time all i felt was intense pain..so intense till i can get up for a few minutes..i dunno how long..how long does it take for us (bear, keli n me) to get over our initial shock n for bear to call yan to open the door for them n for me n yan to haf a small tok bfore i was finally able to limp back to my room to rest..i dunno..so by the time i went to see doc (tat was after both me n yan had bath), i think it was ad quite ok except tat it was damn swollen..had tat stupid yet essential tetanus injection..sigh..sth i hate most..injection...now my arm hurts more than my toe..my family came to kl yest..hehe..so i need not go back by bus..went to pyramid n mid valley to shop..was damn tired n my toe ach like hell..anyway..after all tat had happened, i'm glad to b home at last...

for those who had wished me n to those of u who drop by..

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

Nothing Much...

hmmm..guess it's been a long time since i blog..sigh..too much stuff happen within this time..let's see..we had food fair on 6/12..was quite a success..we managed to sell all our stuff..hehehe..but the money earned is still not enuff for the convo mag..had a damn tiring day..slept from 3pm till ard 7 - 8 pm..hmm..then we were wondering whether to go nite market o cinema..sigh..in the end we went nite market..but being the blur me i tot we were going to cinema..thank God i din really have much time to dress up..only managed to change to long pants which is ad v weird outfit for nite market..tat nite i bcame the joke of the day..hehehe..

been really tired these days..exams coming..yet i have not studied..been watching bleach every second i haf..sigh..thus this tiredness..these few days din turn out really well for me..dunno y..anyway, now haf to stop..really no mood to go on..will put up the pics for food fair n yest trip to midvalley when i feel better..

TRANSNASIONAL SUX....

TRANSNASIONAL SUX...used to love to sit transnasional buses...reasons is tat they are punctual..when the bus is supposed to leave at 1pm, they leave at 1pm sharp..but sadly, this is not the case any longer..the condition of the bus got from bad to worst..first, the three seater bus was replaced by four seater..next, the bus used to b clean..now it's home to cockroaches n flies..all this are consider small problems..i dun mind degrading from three seater to four seater..i dun mnd sharing my seat wif irritating flies n disgusting roaches..wat i cant tolerate most is the driver's inabilty to be punctual..if it's a few minutes late it's ok..but to be half an hour late..man, u must be blind..or are u tat dumb tat u dun even noe how to read ur watch o clock??strangely malaysians dunno how to read their time properly..we got this disease which makes us so prone to being late..it's such a norm ard here..ppl late for lectures, late for dates..even the wedding dinners start late..no wonder we so uncivilised..cos we're always late..late at arriving to the civilised world.....

The Beginning of A New Sem

overall, i'm damn excited n happy..dunno y i really looked forward to this sem..anyway, like all the other sems, i am always lzy..my diary is 3 months outdated n i haven start studying..sigh..

well, had a great week las week..went out almost everyday..n now i haf a big hole in my pocket..hmm..went n watch harry potter on thurs n dragon squad on sat..went to sg wang on sat at ard 8am for delifrance breakfast buffet..damn full..then went over to times sq to watch dragon squad..bought some souveniors for the two visiting lecturers who came today..nice ppl..

later spend my whole day in borders..managed to save $$ as i finished a book i wanted to buy..hmm..dun think i'm going to comment on tat book..but will put in the pic in..finish the anansi boys last week..damn nice..hehehe..really sth i've nv read bfore..hmm..my recent mood wasnt as happy as i tot..tot i'll b damn happy this sem..oh well, u cant haf everything in the world..going back this weekend..damn looking forward to it..

Someone who Always Noes How to Cheer Me Up....

"replying your nick... if you are like the leaves on the trees, i will NOT be there to catch u...in the first place i wont let you detach yourself from the tree... cos onli leaves which are weak and withered will fall to the ground...got it haha... gotta go, juz online to reply ya... tata"

hehe..cant bear to delete this so i decided to paste it here..where i can view it everytime i online..well, i am not depressed o sad..in fact wat i'm feeling now is far from it..thanks for everything..all the best for ur exams..see ya soon......

dear airen,

guess it's now my turn to reply u..really damn gan dong tat u went online jus to reply me..but i'm still wondering how u noe my nick..hmmm..i was still toking to u when i change my nick??hehehe..u noe lar me..a bit blur one..anyway, i jus read the first part of it from a blog..find it kinda meaningful..the second part, "will u b there to catch me?" is sth i added..since the day i laid my eyes on the nicci french book i haf always been wondering who will catch me when i fall..hehehe..anyway thanks for everything..you really warmed my heart....miss you lots....

-neno-

Last Day of Work

tat will be tomolo..sigh..kinda missed them..and to think tat we've only known each other for a month o so..some even less..n yet they are going to belanja me tmr..hmmm..sudd i was wondering if i'm really tat bad tat they are celebrating my last day of work..wel..life's too short to think bout all this..

Goal!!

hmmm..i paid RM 8 and i got the whole cinema to myself..in case some of u who still dun get the whole pic, i'm the only person in the cinema while watching goal on Deepavali..therefore, i did not silence my mobile for the first time while in cinemas..n i feel super duper vvvvip..cos the movie starts as soon as i sit down..

no lenghty nonsense advertisements..hehehehe..hmm..too bad my vip-ness soon ends..a guy walks in n sat in my row..too bad he was an old guy..very old..like ah pek..luckily he got shadow one..n he walks n not drifts..o else..i think i'll b scared to death..ok..at first tot goal was either not nice o most ppl had watched it ad..o prob cos i watch the earliest slot one..hmmm..thank God the movie was nice..damn nice..would love to watch it again..hehehe..ok..tat's all for now..damn tired from work lar..

prob wont blog for this break anymore..as for the future..i'm not sure..cos i made a promise to myself to study real hard for sem 5..might not haf any time to blog anymore..so guess this is the las blog for now..unless i got sth really happy/sad to tok bout..btw..jus bought a book titled Anansi Boys..damn nice..haven got time to read finish..sigh..woking life sux!!no time to even sit down n relax n enjoy a book..damn neno...............

lastly,

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI..AND HAPPY DEEPAVALI..(kinda late..but i think i rmr hearing from Anbu that Deepavali is not jus one day..hehehe)

Wat a Small World

Day 1

reported myself at the HR department today..saw my future colleague..who turns out to b my grand senior from IMU..was showed ard the hospital till ard 9.10 am..then was shown to the pharmacy dept..where we (my grand senior n i) was introduced to the head pharmacist..then we were introduced to the second pharmacist in charge..who, surprise, surprise, turn out to be my great grand senior from IMU..is this world small o wat..well..was introduced to the rest of the team..all nice ppl..hehehe..was told tat on our first day we do not need to do anything jus sit there n watch..basically wasting ur time n getting into ppl's way..cos the place is kinda crowded wif a terlebih org like me esp when i do not haf any qualifications yet..to make things worst..the pharmacy dept wasnt told bout my arrival..they knew my grand senior was coming but they do not noe that i'm supposed to come..sad huh..hehehe..

anyway..from the moment i went into the room, my eyes was constantly at the clock o watch..waiting for lunch break to come..which is at 1pm..damn nervous..results coming out today..so was quite tempted to sneak bhind n grab my hp looking for sms..hehehe..finally the lunch break arrives..mum came to fetch me home..grab my bag n left..took my hp out..saw bear's sms..was overjoyed..cos it meant i din fail........till i open the sms..i neither fail nor pass..the results was not released..results was postphoned till wed..apparently our batch did badly n strathclyde is remarking..isnt tat great?!?well, then had a quick lunch..n rushed back..after lunch break my eyes are still fixed on the clock n watch..counting the secs off..planning wat to do after 5pm..finally 5pm arrives..hehehe..went home..and believe it o not i was damn tired..damn strange..it's not as if i did A LOT today..went back, bath, had dinner n slept at 8pm...did i mention i was sick??so it wasnt a great day for me..bored..............

Day 2

well, my grand senior told me today he was toking to my senior on the phone yest..i was like huh?toking to my senior?!?i tot p1/03 was in scotland..plus i dunno which senior he was refering to..later found out tat he was refering to my mentor..glad to hear her doing fine..hmm..the world is small..like everywhere everyone everything got connection..oh well..today is a busy day..learn plenty of stuff..n blieve me..the extemporaneous dispensing is much much easier than the ones we did in PP1..

prob cos i was only allowed to handle easy stuff..hehehe..prob there wasnt any pressure as no one is there to gif u a ZERO..oh well..anyway i learn how to make syrup n stuff..n act dispense it to real patients..well..under strict supervision of course...was allowed to dispense medications too..learn quite a lot bout diff medicines..and also a few things bout the docs..hehehe..n i no longer hope for the time to pass..in fact i was kinda reluctant to leave when the time comes..strange huh?well..let's hope i pass tmr..n no more delay..then i can see doc for my sickness..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

Running Out of Titles

jus finish reading my fren's blog..strange..how come there are so many ppl out there who thinks they are not beautiful..hmmm..guess this is sth i wont b able to understand..cos i guess i nv felt ugly before..from day 1 of my life i always think i'm beautiful..although a bit way too fat..but nevertheless still beautiful..hehehe..my dear ai ren..i think u look great in the pic u took wif ur toiletmate..

saw this article in newspaper few days back..was an article bout dove..n their challenge to change stereotype beauty..as in, most ppl thing tat gals mus haf long hair etc..n dove wanna change ppl's view of it..u can b beautiful even if u haf short hair n not modelly thin..u dun haf to b like most ppl to b beautiful..jus b urself..i believe everyone no matter wat size n shapes n wat skin colour they are beautiful in their own way..the only way u can make urself ugly is the way u dress urself n the way u carry urself..

so to those who are always feeling tat they are not thin enuff (includes me) not pretty enough etc..this song is dedicated to you...

Every day is so wonderful

And suddenly, i saw debris

Now and then, I get insecure

From all the pain, I'm so ashamed

I am beautiful no matter what they say

Words can't bring me down

I am beautiful in every single way

Yes, words can't bring me down

So don't you bring me down today

To all your friends, you're delirious

So consumed in all your doom

Trying hard to fill the emptiness

The piece is gone left the puzzle undone

That's the way it is

You are beautiful no matter what they say

Words can't bring you down

You are beautiful in every single way

Yes, words can't bring you down

Don't you bring me down today...

No matter what we do (no matter what we do)

No matter what they say (no matter what they say)

When the sun is shining through

Then the clouds won't stay

And everywhere we go (everywhere we go)

The sun won't always shine (sun won't always shine)

But tomorrow will find a way

All the other times

'cause we are beautiful no matter what they say

Yes, words won't bring us down, oh no

We are beautiful in every single way

Yes, words can't bring us down

Don't you bring me down today

Don't you bring me down today

Don't you bring me down today

the only prob is tat u haf to sing it to urself..hehehe..cos i dunno how to change this blog's song to this..

The Undomestic Goddess

finish reading this book on sat..sigh..makes me think A LOT..bout the one question tat's been bothering me ever since i step in IMU on 9/2/2004..the one question which i've constantly ignored n pushed to the back of my head..had been wondering for days if i really wan to be a pharmacist..where stress n heavy responsibilities are the recipe..where no mistakes are supposed to be made..where ideally humans worked flawlessly..where i dun seem to belong..i've nv been one of those who are able to thrive under stress n pressure..

anyway..this book is a great one..better than the other books by the same author..too bad now i've got nothing to read other than the daily papers..

You're Beautiful..

well..i should haf posted this entry long time ad..but i think by posting it on 10/10 will be more meaningful..this entry is dedicated to someone special..you noe who you are..hmmm..basically i dunno wat more to write..cos most of the important stuff is ad highlighted by qi..but i would like you to noe tat you are one of the important ppl in my life..glad tat we had a huge misunderstanding las time..hehehe..or else i dun think i'll appreciate u this much..hmmm..i dunno why but this song kept popping in my head.........

You are beautiful no matter what they say

Words can't bring you down

You are beautiful in every single way

Yes, words can't bring you down......

well..at least part of the song..hehehe..well..i hope i'm able to bring tears to your eyes by now..which i very much doubt will happen..but i do hope tat if there really were tears, those tears are tears of joy..sigh..guess i really am bad at words..perhaps a hug will be able to explain all tat i wanna say..perhaps..so u better get ur ass back to kl this year..hehehe..ok lar..tat's all for now

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU...

The Longest Yard

the longest yard..nice movie..reminds me of IMU cup..speaking of which we got second for cheerleading n third overall..strange thing is i dun feel happy at all..perhaps i sort of expected sth..oh well, it's over..but ppl..if u're really free like me u should go watch the longest yard..flight plan was nice too..very well-planned..but somehow not everyone was able to understand it..i think..cos so far the comments i heard was not really good..i guess diff ppl haf diff taste..i love it..it has a very good plot..sth which i dun see from movies nowadays..

saw this book in MPH on 29/9..seems nice..really wanna buy but too bad..i'm now banned from buying anymore books..reason?my house is currently full of books..sigh..the book is by a couple..nicci french (dunno which name is the guy n shish is the gal..) title : catch me when i fall..hehehe..n it's this title which catches my eye..flipped thru it too..damn nice..hehehe..trying to persuade my mum to let me buy this one..hehehe..

nothing impressive i done these days..unless u can count going back to imu on 4th to watch the cheer leading n came back on 5th as impressive..thanks keli for keeping me company..

ok..got to go for now..tomolo got to celebrate my mum's n mine chinese bday..hehehehe..will start working on 17th October..so i guess this semester break wasnt so bored at all..currently reading the undomestic goddess (by the same author of can u keep a secret?)

ps: dear ai ren..if u are reading this may i remind u tat my bday is coming..n all i wan is to take a pic wif u..hehehe..oh ya n to anyone who haf ken hirai's songs (any song will do) and fish leong's silk road..pls contact me..thanks..n to those in jb n are bored pls contact me..i'm dying to go out..hehehe

Finally!!

finally!!finally pharmacy won the basketball match against M1/04..God is indeed fair..but happiness is short..jus when i tot we'll get first in basketball this year, we lost to sem 1..how? i'm not sure myself..prob was too tired..cos although i was there i din noe wat was going on..jus noe tat i dun like one of the referees..sigh..IMU cup as usual has been unfair..sometimes i wonder y..y pharmacy batch still wanna play when they noe they wont win fairly..no matter how good we are, we'll still lose..it's such a waste of time..is it??i think i got the answers when i read keli's blog..pharmacy batch always have the semangat to play..it doesnt matter if we win o lose..but then i think it'll be a better event if ppl win fair n square n the end result is not tat pharmacy always gets last o second last n that Sem 5 always wins the cup..if pharmacy batch is really tat lousy in the games i got nothing more to say..i wont even be so hardworking to b typing all this..but from wat i see is tat pharmacy batch this year is diff from the previous years..we've got more ppl who're capable of winning..and it's strange tat although we won quite a lot of events this year our ranking in the IMU cup is still way behind..prob if any of the committee of the IMU cup can enlighten me in this (or anyone who actually noe wat's behind this??)..or perhaps after months of counting doses i'm only capabe of transfering units of the active ingredient??hmm..probably the marks were counted in such a way tat normal ppl with normal common sense like me can never understand..like the way i can never understand physics..oh well..i jus hope tat for other events like track n field n cheerleading we can win as well..hmm..i jus rmr sth..i rmr bear told me tat this yr IMU cup has debate..strange isnt??and apparently is cos that one of the committee members can debate..man..wat's going on??does tat mean tat i noe how to play mahjong then i can include it in IMU cup??wont tat b nice??as long as no money is involved playing mahjong is not gambling..i'm really looking forward for the day when IMU cup has mahjong..

hmm..like happiness, sadness is short-lived too..well, after the basketball finals, we went to sri petaling to eat at waffer's world..and..surprise, surprise!! (well, if u read elyne's blog ad then it wont b much of a surprise..)my best frens in IMU, namely agnes, ai lynn, christina, elyne, huey, sze lay n boyfren n tze yan, celebrated my bday..in case some of u who din noe, my bday is in october..so pls dun start sms-ing me..hehehe..a bit perasan i noe..well, i guess i was too happy to be free again tat i din noticed tat my frens were acting strangely the whole day..seriously i did find it strange when patricia wished me happy bday but later dismissed it..was too engrossed in the basketball finals i guess..it was really a pleasant surprise and to all my frens who contribute tat nite..thank you..cos i noe it's not easy to organise this when we were in the midst of exam..esp u guys haf to celebrate rite after the exams..plus, in such a short time and notice too..thanks..i really cant imagine how great u are..mainly by being able to come up wif sth so special..hehehe..and as for my bday wishes, let's hope it comes true..hehehe..

finally, the last point for this entry..i'm finally free..free from exams!!too bad i'm not free from worry and anxiety yet..let's jus hope we all pass..